So I am currently 38 years old, a full time Veterinary Radiographer, triathlon and general sport lover and separated. I was with my husband for 18 years but split over a year ago. Like with many relationships we had are up’s and downs but mainly we had great times together. I do not regret anything to do with my marriage as its brought me to this point in my life, what I do regret is being unhappy for such a long time. That was the final point in the end for me, I was fed up of being unhappy, we were great together, but as friends. It turned out that he felt the same. We never argued and it was all quite calm really, it still is. I feel it’s set us both free and given us what we really wanted out of life that prehaps we couldn’t do together. All I want is for him to be happy and love life and that’s the way I feel now. The opportunities I have in front of me feel endless now and it’s really given me a new lease of life, something to live for. I feel less depressed and lonely which is obviously an amazing feeling as well.
I have met someone new and he has been so understanding about my previous marriage. We try to keep things respectful in terms of social media etc and to be honest just keep things to ourselves like it should be. With this in mind I have been completely honest with my ex husband about my new boyfriend so that he is aware of whats going on and so nothing is really done behind his back in a way, I feel he deserves that at least.
When the husband and I lived together we had a gorgeous little furry baby, a boston terrier called Chester. We did not have any children which is sort of a blessing now really. He has been very understanding of the fact that with my job and the training that I do for triathlon, it’s just not feasible for me to keep a dog and I am hugely grateful of that. Chester seems very happy with him as well which is all I want. On reflection, it’s sad to say that I feel like Chester was keeping us together, I felt lonely and he was a perfect distraction to give my love to. I really miss him and his goofy dog ways!
My parents, well what can I say about them that isn’t echoed by many. They are so extremely supportive of me and everything I do. Obviously more recently they have been very worried and concerned about me and how I was coping with the separation but I think they now see how strong I am (or stubborn) and realise I am going to be ok, and that they don’t need to worry about me. I love them so dearly and cherish all the time I can get to spend with them. I hope and think they are proud of me, they always come and support me at my races and especially enjoy the post race drinks! I just really do hope that I do them proud.
At the moment I currently own what was the marital home, a beautiful 3 bedroom house in Cheshire. It is sometimes a little weird still living there because of all the history and memories but again, if it wasn’t for all those good and bad times I wouldn’t be where I am now so I try and embrace them. I have made changes to make it feel more like my own home and I think it has worked. I really love my home and I feel relaxed, safe and warm there. I think the boyfriend feels very at home there as well which is what I want as I don’t want him to feel uncomfortable there.
Throughout my posts, for the moment I don’t want to name names so I want to refer to my partner as the boyfriend and my ex husband as the ex husband. I just want to keep their identities confidential for now.
The next step and dream would be to move to Chester near the river. We love being close to the water and I think it really relaxes and calms both of us. This comes with a price tag though so it’s a goal we are working towards but I know we will get there. I think it’s nice to have a dream and a goal to work towards, I feel it gives you more drive and determination to succeed.
So that’s a little bit about me, a quick overview of my life. I will post about various parts of my life in more detail in future blogs but I thought I would give you a quick overview to start with!